Friday, November 9, 2012
When you spend a lot of time trying to talk your body out of being in pain—or ignoring the pain as best as you can—eventually you reach a point where you stop being able to distinguish your body's basic pleas for attention. You start to get angry or frustrated or tearful and you can't tell why. Some minor task goes awry and you become infuriated. You ask yourself, "Am I hungry?—because I don't feel particularly hungry..." but you eat something anyway. Or "Am I thirsty? I don't think I'm thirsty, but I guess I'll drink some water." And then "Am I tired? Because I don't feel any more tired than usual. Do I need a nap?" And then you notice the throbbing in your hands—or your feet, or your knees, or your head—and realize, "Oh, right, I'm in pain. Still. Again."